Saturday, October 2, 2010

Strange, "contaminated" place

I have been blessed this year with artistic successes (chronicled on this blog site). The culmination of a good year was my solo exhibit at the Mohawk Valley Center for the Arts. After the whirlwind summer and trip to Europe; followed by hanging my show and trying to get the school year off to a good start, I now find myself ready to "get back to the table" where I enjoy creating my collages. But I find that in some way(s) my recent successes have "contaminated" my process, in a way. I am certainly not complaining; but I am recognizing that I find myself feeling like I need to put together a "good/great" piece every time I sit down to create. That is, I feel much more self-conscious about trying to do something really impressive; as opposed to "simply" creating pieces that express myself artistically. It doesn't really feel like an artistic "block", but rather it feels like too much self-monitoring. And yet, I don't want to abandon all monitoring so that I'm throwing together crap. Today after grading statistics exams, I've decided to do some cleaning of my messy studio and getting reacquainted with my various specimens of collage materials. I am thinking of trying some new styles, but at the same time do not want to compromise my "voice". All of this is good in that it continues the on-going contemplative state of being a creator, methinks. But it has been a week or two of self-uneasiness in a way. I am looking forward to what the road(s) ahead have in store. If you've had similar experiences, I'd love to hear from you about it. Hope you enjoy!

1 comment:

  1. I know exactly how you're feeling right now. I'm in the middle of getting some canvasses ready for a Christmas art fair and I'm having the "are they good enough" panics. I'm trying to step back a bit, remember that I'm supposed to be enjoying this as well, and then trying again with some renewed vigour! :)