Last year I read a post on someone's blog that they didn't like viewing blogs that were just photos of artwork. I tend to like that myself. This particular blogger was looking for more "meaty" entries from bloggers. I think this entry might "qualify" for what he was talking about...
Lately, I feel as though I am going through another "phase" in my creative journey. I don't think it's necessarily a negative phase, but it has been a bit bothersome as of late. At this point, I am just trying to "go with the flow" a little bit and deal with what I'm experiencing (hoping to learn from it). Let me explain. Over the past several years I have had MANY successes as a collage artist (more than I could have ever dreamt of 10 years ago)! It really has been great! As I have grown as a collagist, so has my workspace. I used to work in the space of half of one of our guest bedrooms. I moved up into our attic space for a short while; and now have quite a sprawling area in the basement (space heater in the winter; de-humidifier in the summer). Over the past several years I have also collected (accumulated) hundreds of magazine and scores of books from which I cull the elements for my collages. One of my favorite things to do when I have limited time or when I am not feeling particularly creative, is to peruse my vintage magazines and books and tear out the pages with the most compelling images for collage. This has lead me to have a stack of hundreds of pages of awesome elements from which to choose for collage creation. So this all sounds "good", right? What's the "phase", Monkeybrain? I think a combination of recent continued success and the presence and awareness of so much interesting raw materials has resulted in a feeling of being a bit overwhelmed or intimidated. I like to be the "driven" individual I am, both in my profession as a college professor and as a collagist; but sometimes I think I "put too much pressure" on myself. When I descend into my studio area, lately I have been feeling like I "have to" create something "really good". Or I get the feeling like I should be using the many great elements that I have RIGHT NOW! It seems like I have lost the Zen of my collage experience. This makes it difficult to enter what Csikszentimihalyi refers to as "flow". I write this post not to "whine" or to seek sympathy; but rather to share my experiences. I am assuming that some of my readers have experienced (or may be experiencing) this phase at some point in their creative journey. Perhaps it will be a good feeling to know that you are "not alone". I am referring to my feelings as a "phase", because I am also assuming that "this too shall pass". I am trying to learn from this experience and potentially grow from it. I believe I had a similar phase some years ago when I was playing more music. Occasionally I would feel "pressure" when I got together with my musician friend Goody to play guitar (after not having played for a while). We would put TOO much pressure on ourselves to "play something cool". This pressure inhibited "flow" and resulted in less-than-satisfying jam sessions sometimes. Once we worked through it and found a space where we could relax and enjoy the moment, the music "flowed" again. I trust that this will be my experience with collage as well. I suspect that this kind of phase is common in many domains. I have often heard professional golfers say that their game "came around" again after they started enjoying it. All that being said, I did spent some intense time in my studio last night cleaning and re-organizing some stuff AND experimenting with some sketches. I wouldn't want to post this entry without any images... so here are some of last night's sketches. Thanks for your indulgence in hearing about my latest "phase" ;-)